March 23rd, 2012

  • roybot

gooey pledge members do not touch

the pledge members are after me again. i refuse to participate in the neighborhood watch program, and my patch of crocus flowers is slightly off-kilter in relation to the front path. sometimes i even forget to put my garbage out on garbage day. but still, i do not deserve this harassment. the pledge members conspire with the mailman and the mailman does not check my mailbox some days. the pledge member hit squad flies by my residence in the early AM, throwing little plastic bags onto my driveway, bags which contain a handful of white rocks, along with a suggestion that i align my crocus patch. i have made a pile of them on my front lawn out of protest: a pile of rocks in bags. it gets rained on. my crocuses are unaware. but the pledge members continue their harassment: shutting off my visa card for "fraud" when there is no fraud, then bombarding me with credit card offers. blowing leaves onto my lawn with leaf blowers, then complaining that i have leaves on my lawn. telling me my call is important, while continuing to ignore it. fucking pledge members

Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker