April 9th, 2010

  • roybot

the ethically unhealthy and capitalization: a discourse

in this essay i posit that capitalization, as it were, was started in ancient macedonia by aeropos II in the year 397 b.c. as a method to create a caste system for proper and improper (unclean) nouns. and, henceforth, all letters not capitalized would be hitherto known as case... aeropos, being of royal decent, commanded his name be "screamed" in textual concourse at all times --i.e. all caps, in modern terms--; failure to do so resulted in what was called textual castration of those committed (basically hand castration).

</p>in subsequent years, punctuation proliferated to procure capitalization of letters at the beginning of an idea to signify greatness and cast out those following words as being less than. jesus of nazareth was wicked pissed at all these dudes bein' all pompous n' shit wit' all this cap'talization... according to most historians (other than those suppressed rouges) jesus was crucified onaccounta being called the "king of the jews"; in actuality it was his stout, anti-capitalization agenda which brought about his demise. evidence of such is apparent: "but peter rose and ran to the memorial tomb, and, stooping forward, he beheld the empty can of spray paint alone. so he went off. wondering within himself at what had occurred.]]"1. It was well known in the days of jesus, he wandered the countryside de-capitalizing whatever letters which thought themselves "above god" as to have the grandiloquence to be capitalized... the prophet guywittapen (one of jesus' desciples) came upon jesus in his resurrected state: and was told by the man himself of the afterlife of such capitalizers. he foretold an eternal existence in the darkest dwellings of hades where such sinners are forced to rewrite everything ever written in the most evil font ever created: microsoft's "wing dings". (wingdings) </p>

as christianinty began to grow in popularity, the elitist illuminati caught wind of the dangers such an agenda. being an elitist group, they wanted such a way to differentiate themselves textually via capitalization. hence, being all powerful, were able to pervert the biblical scripture to suit their upper-cased needs. Ever since this moment, the dangers of capitalization have been suppressed by the new world order.

certain movements have popped up in varying locations about the world in recent years: the anti-caps association (aca) based in basingstoke england and lower case alliance (lca), a more militant group led by a mystic known only as "jes". yes, jes with one s; based in an undisclosed location in northern south america (these are just a few examples). it is widely know that the .7 for life coalition (a non-integer religious organisation) is a staunch supporter of such groups...</p>

all i ask of you, the reader is to think of what you do to those non-capitalized words whenever you hit that shift key, or even worse, the dreaded caps lock. think about how those words feel being segregated and looked down upon by anyone who's eyes happen to receive the reflected light of such poor souls... capitalization is not ethically right in any sense. failure to heed to this suppressed doctrine of pure goodness could result in an eternity of wingdings...

1luke 24:12

Posted by shitbowl