January 12th, 2007

  • roybot

tenne graeme hamme

it was the 18th gibbon of edwards, and poets were waxing. twelve-hundred thousand identical toothpicks, yours for the taking. gravis potentiae, my friend, that of which pies can only aspire to. melting pudding disassembles matrices upon delivery, funneling clambourines along the faint lines of society. how do you know? you grow. plantaloons, fault lines, and jersey city, the capitol of which is paris hilton. but rheostatis, donkey donkey malarky, that but thee, nay?

say it loud, say it proud: qqq muthafucka

Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker
  • roybot

zeppellin dirigible tom

oem adapters fufill a wacky and/or crazy role in today's information trouser economy. the volume of the industry is such that manufacturers have been forced to turn to outdated computer programming references, as well as a few copies of penthouse when they're in the mood. should your cup of idea tea arrive an ounce above schedule, captain christopher malarky will declare himself too old to bed jived, and dingos will eat berries, yum yum.

remember: just because i can['t] doesn't mean you can['t].

Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker
  • roybot

"boat loaf," and other curiosities penned by theodore q. entloaf

"superior walnuts"

a gentleman of distinction
shall exude succinction
when walnuts doth he
pluck from his tree.


"boat loaf"

boat loaf, boat loaf,
where could you be?
nary a boat loaf as far as the eye can see!
silver shiny boat loaf,
come to me!


"lincoln town and country"

thou art a savage but noble beast,
mine lincoln town and country,
and when i'm dining effervescent,
i drive you through existential funtry.


"hat hymen"

i say
pop pop pop
have you seen
pop pop pop
my vaginal folds?
flap flap flap


"steve is a jerk"

steve is a jerk
while i was at work
he porked my lady


"nothing at the dollar store costs a dollar"

nothing at the dollar store costs a dollar.
yet, people seem alarmed when i hoot and hollar,
"i want justice! truth! extreme bargains!"
so it's over to borders to stock up on records by the cardigans


Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker
  • roybot

lincoln town and bat country

yo yo word up
this one's goin' out to my home-slice the the lincoln town 'n' country 'n' shit

lincoln town 'n' country
existential funtry
elemental lentil
serious dental
lincoln clown 'n' country
u think u got unlicensed uhf band telemetry?
my lincoln put u in the cemetary
piss on your pants
them muthafuckas be driven by hugh g. government grants.
flap flap flap
that aint no vaginal fold
lincoln town 'n' bat country
is startin' 2 take hold


RESPECT, yo!

Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker
  • roybot

funnybears.exe

if jesus were a bear, he would be a care bear.
if richard d. james were a bear, he would be a snare bear.
if tom jenkinson were a bear, he would be a hair bear.
if tom jenkinson had no hair, he would be a bare bear.

Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker