January 27th, 2006

  • roybot

green tea

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Posted by cakedrink the nefarious
  • roybot

Operation C.H.E.E.S.E.S.T.I.C.K.

+00.00.00 Event Log Started

+00.01.25 Subject designated [Snack X-Ray] removed from primary cyro unit
+00.02.07 Subject is debagged and trayed.
+00.02.45 Boxed samples are returned to cryo unit.(Note: Telemetry shows primary cyro unit remained locked down for the remainder of incident)
+00.03.12 Toaster oven #1 [Mass production prototype X03] is powered up.
+00.04.45 Test plug is removed.
+00.05.06 Control room audio feed records following exchange between Col. Roget and Dr. Windrow:
W:...unsure of the affects the conditions of the Toaster will have on cheese that is untested...
R: Nonsense, this test has been delayed long enough. Proceed as soon as you get the green light.
W: Then I can not be held responsible for the safety of the sample. We've worked to hard...
R: We worked so we'd have something to test. Proceed.
+00.06.45 Toaster oven reaches core temp of 475 degrees and holds. Telmetry reports slight breadcrumb discrepancy; Dr. Roget lab notes indicate that it was well within the limits established in earlier tests.
+00.08.05 Entry plug is inserted, timer is set at 10 minutes or intill well browned.
+00.15.32 Entry plug attendant signals that he has heard "A wicked pop" from within the entry plug.
+00.15.57 Rapid drop in cheese pressure sensor #2 seems to indicate a loss of mozzarella integrity.
+00.16.01 Order is given from control room to pop the entry lug, power down the toaster and secure subject.
+00.16.37 Sensors indicate loss of containment.
+00.16.59 Loss of medical telemetry from entry plug attendant.
+00.17.12 All floor cameras fail, deleting image cache. (One partial image was later recovered. See attached Fig.1)
+00.17.39 Control room breached.
+00.18.02 Loss of medical telemetry from Dr. Windrow
+00.18.13 Loss of medical telemetry from Col. Roget
+00.20.42 Project officaly ends when HQ activates failsafe.
+00.25.00 NORAD reports PINNACLE: NUCFLASH alert for Army base known as "Area Kitchen"

Posted by Supporter of Ham #2361